FOR THE FIRST TIME IN 3 YEARS

For the first time in a long time, she picked up her pen to spill her usual thoughts on the straight line of a white page and none came. The ink simply refused to flow from the pen, so she scribbled on the plain papers but no one could decipher that which she had written.

For the first time in a long time, she held my hands to dance our usual ritual dance but she could not tango with me. She got all the steps wrong and tripped a million times with a dazed look; one lost in a world with no thoughts of finding her way back.

For the first time in a long time, she smiled an unusual smile with such pain in her eyes; one only experienced by hurt and betrayal. The animated smile coated with deception and lie; not to the world but to herself that everything within was fine on the outside.

For the first time in a long time, she spoke; not in the usual manner she speaks. Words about a man she loved, more about a man she felt she never expressed enough to but did so much for her. A man who loved her unconditionally and made her think he’ll always be there.

For the first time in 3 years she turned her back to the world, not in the usual manner she turns but to shield herself from all the noise and sorrow.  And so her back was turned and no one noticed for she always was the defender and inspiration to many.

For the first time in a long time, I set out to look for ‘Bertty’. Not to ask for anything but to see how she’s doing. ‘Bertty’, I whispered, as I put my hand gently on her shoulder. ‘Are you ok?’ I asked. Tis then Bertty turned and whispered: ‘Father, I miss you’…

Little wonder for the first time in a long time, she alone could decipher her writing, incapable of tango, with a pained smile and her back to the world.

 

Image Credit: Keep Calm o Matic

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