Fancy that! I wish I was a lady; a very pretty lady. Fancy that I was a sexy lady; a very sexy lady. I would swing my hips like a pendulum in my old grandfather’s clock. I would tease all the men that come by and make them pay hard currency to gaze at my rare beauty. I would make kings fall at my feet and beckon on princes to stroke my hair. I would make their servants bathe me with the best of ointments and oil my skin with Monoi Oil. They would rub my feet and brush my hair then, shall they know that I am the fairest of them all.
Fancy that! I wish I was a lady; a very pretty lady. I would walk the streets during the day for other women to see. Fancy that I was a sexy lady; a very sexy lady. I would be in no form of competition with them for I alone shall possess all the qualities of a desirous woman for Delilah would only have learnt from me. Women from far and near would come to ask for advice and beauty tips; jealous of how I stand out as the ‘Beauty’ only that they are the ‘Beast’.
Fancy that! I wish I was a lady; a very pretty lady. I would sleep at night for I shall not want my beauty to fade away in the morning. I shall have servants feed me with Kiwi, pomegranate and berries to keep my skin fresh for another day. Fancy that I was a sexy lady; a very sexy lady. I would have breakfast in El Celler De Can Roca, Spain, lunch in Le Cinq, Paris, brunch in Pikayo, Puerto Rico and dinner in La Pecora Nera Ristorante, Costa Rica then go to bed in Banyan Tree, Seychelles.
But I am not a sexy lady, I am only a guy from Nsim Utong village in Akwa Ibom State and no wonder I was born a man and not a lady for then I would have made grown men shed tears; tears for the price of pleasure.
Image Credit: Beauty Guide